The kayaking season of 2019 was both my best and worst.

I won the waterside series and a bunch of Hasler races. I was promoted to division 1. I was selected for the GB surfski squad and marathon kayaking squad and raced in France, Germany, Portugal and the Netherlands. I was the fastest I’d ever been and was excited to get on the start line of the World Championships in Quiberon wearing a GB vest.

Then came type 1 diabetes. Three weeks before the world championships and I received a life-changing diagnosis. Racing at world champs was off the cards.

So when I got the opportunity to head out to Portugal for the 2023 edition of the world championships, I jumped at the chance. How great to bring things full circle, even if I wouldn’t be at peak physical fitness like last time, having just finished insulin 360.

Race day.

It was an overcast and humid day for the 20km downwind run between Viana do Castelo and Ofir’s beach near Esposende, in the north of Portugal.

We started with a short sprint to our surfskis left by the water’s edge and a chaotic launch into the frigid Atlantic, paddles flying.

Managing blood sugars in competition is always difficult. Pre-race nerves release a cocktail of hormones that cause insulin resistance – more insulin is needed to keep sugar levels stable. You can’t simulate pre-race nerves and having not raced much since my diagnosis, I had to take a bit of a guess.

I decided to double my basal insulin and predicted this would counteract the flow of carbohydrate drink I’d be sipping on to keep fuelled for the hour and a half of intense racing.

I got away well and made use of the washes for the first kilometre as we paddled out from the shelter of a breakwater. The field then rapidly dispersed as everyone chose different lines to the finish.

My diabetes strategy worked well until my hydration pack broke on the frantic start and I lost my precious sugar supply. This distraction made me lose my flow and I started fighting instead of using the swells to my advantage. In truth, I didn’t have the speed or power to catch the waves. My body has adapted to paddling at a relaxed pace for hours on end on my adventure and I’ve lost that top end.

What downwind we had faded and I gritted my teeth to pull hard to the finish. I’ll be honest, it hurt to see people paddle past me towards the end. A conflict arose: I didn’t feel motivated to push hard, so why was I here?

I tried to enjoy it and remember that I hadn’t entered the world champs expecting to come away with a medal. This was all about the experience, catching up with friends, and celebrating getting back on the start line with type 1 diabetes.

Crossing the finish line the endorphins came flooding in and I remembered why I love racing. A massive thank you to Epic Kayaks UK for transporting my boat to the event. I had the privilege of using the new generation 3 V12 which is my new favourite boat – it has the speed of the gen 2 V12 with improved agility and stability on waves.